


Thin Line

by JenTheSweetie



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-14
Updated: 2016-04-14
Packaged: 2018-06-02 06:17:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6554326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenTheSweetie/pseuds/JenTheSweetie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“I want to see him.”</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thin Line

**Author's Note:**

> This is the product of reading Civil War and angsting over the trailers. Some spoilers for the comic. Be aware of criss-crossing timelines and the fact that not all stories have happy endings.
> 
> NOTE: There are additional warnings for this story, but I have included them at the end of the story to avoid spoilers. I advise against reading the end note before reading the story, but feel free to do so if you're concerned.

_1._

__

Tony lifted the paper cup to his lips.

It was empty.  He didn’t know how long it had been empty; he didn’t know how long he’d had it in his hand.  He didn’t even know how long he’d been in the room.  There were no windows, only a long mirror along one wall.  

He set the cup down with a steady hand and looked up at the clock.  The second hand was chugging along, spilling out seconds like blood on the cement.  

The door creaked open.  

“They’re letting you go,” Bruce said.  

Tony nodded, stood up slowly.  The second hand ticked by a few times more.  

“I want to see him.”

 _V_.

“He doesn’t want to see you,” Natasha said flatly.

“I don’t give a shit,” Tony said, pulling off his helmet and slamming it down on the table in the small, cramped office.

“The Department of Justice does,” Natasha said.  “You can’t force visitors on a prisoner.”

“Oh, now he’s a prisoner?” Tony said.

Natasha raised an eyebrow.  “You were the one who brought him in.”

“I brought him in so we could get to Barnes and you know it,” Tony snapped.  “All I want is for him to tell us where - ”

“And you think he’ll tell you?” Natasha said.  “After he let you drag him in here so Bucky had time to get away, you think he’s going to say a word?”

“Barnes _killed_  Rhodey,” Tony said, slamming his gauntleted hand down on the table.  It crumpled under his fist.  “He’s all I’m after.  You know I don’t want Steve to be - ”

“But other people do,” Natasha said.  “Other people want him locked up.  Other people want him taken down.  Did you forget about that when you dragged him in here?  When you took away his shield?”

Tony recoiled.  “Whose side are you on?”

Natasha looked away, pressed her lips together.  “I wasn’t planning to choose.”

“Yeah, well, neither was I,” Tony said.  

_2._

__

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Bruce said.  

“I don’t give a shit,” Tony said.  “He’s here, isn’t he?”

A guard standing in an open doorway nodded once as they passed by.

“Yes,” Bruce said once the guard was out of earshot.  “But he’s - there’s no reason for you to see - ”

“Identification.”

“Done,” Bruce said as they reached the elevator.  “Natasha handled it.  Come on, Tony.  Happy’s outside, he’ll take us back to - ”

“Tell me where he is,” Tony said.

Bruce took off his glasses, cleaned them on his shirt deliberately.  When he looked back, Tony met his eyes.

“Please.”

Bruce pressed his lips together.  “Downstairs.”

Tony pressed the button.

 _IV_.

His phone was ringing.

Tony scrabbled at the bedside table.  “Hello?”

“It’s me,” Steve said.

Tony sat straight up.  “Where are you?”

Steve chuckled.  “You know I’m not going to tell you that.”

“They’ll find you,” Tony said.  “You know that, right?  They’re working around the clock to find you, they’re - ”

“Using your tech to do it?” Steve said quietly.  “Yeah, I know.”

“I didn’t have a choice,” Tony said.

“You always have a choice, Tony,” Steve said.  “You just made the wrong one.”  

Tony balled his fists in the sheets.  “Turn yourself in, Steve.  Both of you.”

“It’s too late for that.”

“It’s not too late.  Just come in, I'll figure it out - ”

“I don’t need you to figure it out,” Steve said.  

“Then why’d you call?”

There was a silence.  Tony stared at the bright red numbers next to his bed.  At 45 seconds, Friday would have the call traced.  33, 34, 35 -

“Because I missed your voice.”

Tony closed his eyes.  “Please,” he said.  “Please just - ”

“Time’s up,” Steve said.  “Goodbye, Tony.”

“Steve,” Tony said.  “Wait - ”

 _Click_.  

 _3_.

Natasha was leaning against the wall next to the door, her arms crossed over her chest.  Her hair hung around her face, and her eyes were dry and clear and focused on Tony as he approached.

“You should go home,” Natasha said.  

“I want to go in,” Tony said.

Natasha glanced at Bruce.  “Why?”

“I want to see him.”

“I’m staying until they - ” 

“I want to see him.”

“Are you sure?” Natasha asked, and Tony could hear everything she wasn’t saying: the barely-controlled rage, the sharp sting of pity.  

“Yes,” Tony said.  “I’m sure.”

 _III_.

“It’s going to get ugly,” Tony said.

Steve rolled out of bed.  “It’s already ugly.  Did you see that article about how I punched you in front of the president?”

“Must have missed it,” Tony said.  “It’s only going to get worse, you know.  We have to put a stop to it.”

“And how do you suggest we do that?” Steve said, pulling on his boxers.  

“Bring him in.”

Steve turned a glare on Tony.  “How many times do we have to have this conver - ”

“I can protect him,” Tony said.

“You can’t,” Steve snapped.  “I’m the only one who can do that.”

Tony pressed his lips together.  “They’re calling you a vigilante.”

Steve shook his head as he buttoned up his shirt.  “Well, they’re always calling me something.  I got used to Captain America, I'll get used to this.”

“I don’t want to have to respond to this publicly,” Tony said.  “But if things keep going like this - after Sokovia, there’s a lot of pressure on me, Steve.  They want transparency.  They want cooperation.  And this thing with Barnes is neither of those.”

“What are you saying?” Steve said.  His hair was a mess and his lips were bitten red and Tony wanted to drag him back to bed, kiss him quiet and make him forget he’d ever brought it up.

“I’m saying,” Tony said, “that I don’t want this battle to become a war.”

Steve narrowed his eyes.  “I’m not the one who wants to fight.”

“Steve,” Tony said.  

“I gotta go,” Steve said.  

“Steve, come on - ”

“I have things to take care of,” Steve said.  “I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

It wasn’t until he was out the door that Tony realized Steve hadn’t even said goodbye.

_4._

__

Natasha uncrossed her arms.  “He wouldn’t want - ”

“Jesus Christ, what do you think I’m going to do to him?”  Tony laughed harshly, the sound ringing in his own ears.  “It’s over.  Remember? I _won_.”  

“That’s not what I meant,” Natasha said.  “He wouldn’t want you to see him - like this.  He loved - ”

“Don’t,” Tony said.  “Don’t you dare say that.”

“Tony - ”

“One minute,” Tony said.  “Just to - be sure.  And then I’ll - I’ll go.”

Natasha shut her eyes briefly, and when she spoke, it was like the words were being dragged out of her.  “If it’s what you want.”

Tony wanted to laugh again, but it got stuck in his throat.  “None of this,” he said, “is what I want.”

_II._

__

“What are you thinking about?”

“Well,” Steve said, “right now I’m thinking about how mushy that question is.”

Tony elbowed him.  “Humor me, Spangles.  I’m trying to be serious.”

“For once in your life.”

Tony sighed dramatically and rolled away.  “All right, I can see this isn’t - ”

“I was kidding, I was kidding,” Steve said, wrapping a hand around Tony’s waist and pulling him back to the center of the bed.  “You really want a serious answer?”

“Yeah, I do,” Tony said, scooting back over until he could slip his arm under Steve’s neck.  Steve wriggled a little bit before settling in, and Tony ran a hand through his messy hair.  

“Okay,” Steve said, closing his eyes.  “I was thinking about - this.”

“This?”

“Yeah,” Steve said.  “You know.  Us.  I never thought I’d - I never thought I’d have anything like this.  Whatever happens now, I’m just glad that this happened first.”

There was a long silence.

“I take it back,” Tony said.  “That was way too serious.”

Steve snorted and pulled Tony in tighter.  “You’re an asshole.”

“I know,” Tony said.  He brushed a kiss to the top of Steve’s head, too light for him to feel it, and listened to him breathing until they both fell asleep.

_5._

__

The room was cold, and dark, and empty.  

Tony had been close enough to hear the bullet, to see the blood dripping down the stairs, to choke on its scent.  They’d taken him away, first for his safety and then, as the panic ebbed and the yellow tape went up, for questioning.  They’d said it in whispers, behind that ice-cold mirror in the interrogation room, but he’d known.  

A person - a supersoldier, even - could only lose so much blood.  

Red and white and blue and red again, laid out on a gunmetal gray table for no one to see.  Tony took a step forward, and then another, his hands numb, his mouth dry.  

He’d known, from the whispers, and the look on Bruce’s face, and the hollowness in Natasha’s eyes, but this was a new kind of knowing.  This was the kind of knowing he would feel every morning when he woke up, the kind that would keep him awake every night for the rest of his life.  The kind of knowing he deserved.  

Steve’s eyes were closed.  Tony was grateful for it.    

“I thought I could win this fight,” Tony said, the words spilling out of his mouth before he could stop them.  “I thought I could get you to see reason.  I thought, Christ, finally, I could do something that I knew was right, something that wasn’t selfish or cowardly.  And if it meant giving you up, giving _us_  up, then it was worth it.  Because I owed it to - to everyone.  I could finally make up for everything I’d done wrong, for all the mistakes I’d made.”

Tony reached out, his hand hovering over Steve’s hair.  It was messy, and he wanted to fix it, he wanted to smooth it down and -

He pulled back.  

“And I did,” Tony said.  “I made up for all of it.  It’s over now.”

He sat down in the chair next to Steve Rogers’ body.

“And you know what?” he said.  “It wasn’t worth it.”

 _I_.

“Are you sure?” Tony said, his lips against Steve’s.  “I just want you to be sure.”

“Tony,” Steve said, “I’m sure.”

“It could get ugly,” Tony said, pressing Steve up against the wall and mouthing his way down Steve’s neck.  “When the media gets hold of this, they’ll have a field day.”

“So we won’t let them,” Steve said.  His hands were working their way under Tony’s shirt, sliding up his back, fingernails scraping.

“And the team - ”

“The team will be fine,” Steve said, pulling Tony closer.  “Any more objections for me to shoot down?”

“The thing is,” Tony said, “I can provide a lot of references and they’ll all tell you the same thing.  I’m a bad idea.”

Steve pulled back.  “A bad idea, huh?”

“Really bad,” Tony said.  “I’m kind of a disaster.”

Steve leaned forward and caught Tony’s lips again, hard and fast and sweet, and then he grinned.

“You know what?" Steve said, and for just a moment Tony saw the whole world in his eyes.  "I think it just might be worth it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Major character death.


End file.
